I Am

I am a lock without a key
I wonder what you are curious about
I hear an imaginary sound I created for myself
I see an imaginary sight that painted itself
I want a real desire
I am a mystery without a clue

I pretend something you pretend to do
I feel a feeling about something I can't see
I touch what seems unreal
I worry something bothers you
I cry when something makes you sad
I am I am a lock without a key

I understand something know is true
I say something you believe in
I dream something you dream about
I try something you made an effort to do
I hope something you hope for
I am a mystery without a clue

The S Word

The Word is S-E-L-F-I-S-H.

The question is: Why are we so selfish?

Why can't we just forget about ourselves for a moment and think about others? I am not saying we all are, although at least once you have thought solely about yourself and your own benefits.

Even in the small things that don't even require any kind of effort, like maybe helping someone in a topic that you are very acquainted with or just offering to help if anyone need it.

Is that too hard to do?

Will that ruin two digits of your precious clock?

I just keep questioning and thinking...

I've done it several times, perhaps I include myself in this.

I've done it! I've done it! (Nothing I am proud of)

Sometimes it disgusts me and makes me nauseous to think about that fact and how I am capable of perfectly accomplishing it.

UGH!

Why are we so selfish?

He will give me the future I hope for

This year has been a year of challenges and emotional battles, when you find yourself suddenly growing and maturing you don't have time for little whines that won't take you anywhere. When you're caught in this process your life twirls around in circles and you are no longer worrying about what you are going to name your new toy, but now you're thinking about how to get through this last year, college and future.
I am there right now, but I don't seem to have time for all of it together. School is being as usual: stresses here and there, homeworks, annoying teachers and blah, blah, blah... But college now is my main concern, the year is already flying and I don't seem to have anything done.
I have my career planned out, but it is impossible to find an appropiate college where my subject is well taught and where financials are not making me sick every two seconds. What a drag! This is not how I saw it happen. God says he has it all planned out and that He will give me the future I hope for, right? Then why can't I just get it right now? Why can't I just magically get over all of that and just be where I aspire to be. But then I am just going to be a some sort of lazy-head? I DON'T want to be that.
Well, I guess if God has it all figured out then everything is going to be ok. I trust Him. I really do.
Let's see where this brand new (well not quiet) year will take me.

Faith.